Archive for June, 2005

History Lesson, Part II: Fort de Chartres

Thursday, June 30th, 2005

Lost in the rural emptiness of western Randolph County, Illinois (just south of Metro East St. Louis) are quite a few hidden gems. Amidst the farms and taverns and lonely, viewless drives one can find the sites of two French forts, a system of gorgeous natural bluffs along the Mississippi River, a beautifully restored circa 1800 French mansion, and the first capital of Illinois, now reduced by Mother Nature and her unforgiving river systems to a virtual ghost town. Here, part two of three in a brief series on these landmarks: Fort de Chartres.

Fort de Chartres

In the late 1600s, the French moved down the Mississippi River system from French Canada to increase their fur trapping business; most colonists were not interested in settling down in the New World like their British counterparts, but instead planned to become rich off the abundant furs that could be captured in the Americans and return to Europe rolling in the bling bling. With the English in the east moving into what would become the pre-French and Indian War Colonies, French settlers claimed the eventual Northwest Territories and the Mississippi down to the port of New Orleans at the mouth of that mighty river.

Manson Family Movies dvd

Last week I briefly covered the history of the lost city of Kaskaskia (2000 population: nine,) the oldest city in Illinois, founded in 1703. The first capital of Illinois and hub of area trading under both the French and British, it was protected under the former landlord not only by Fort Kaskaskia to the immediate east, but by Fort de Chartres eighteen miles up the Mississippi River. That fort has been reconstructed, and now stands as one of Illinois’ most attractive historical landmarks.

Need some ammo?The French threw up the original log fences of the fort in the 1720s to protect the local fur traders from the Fox Indians, who for some reason did not want to recognize the exclusive trade charter granted the colonists by French King Louis XV. The Mississippi laughed at the French effort to protect their people, and promptly ate the original Fort with one surge of her muddy waters. Oddly not wanting to surrender, the French rebuilt the Fort a bit more inland, but abandoned her a decade later as the primary garrison in the area moved to Fort Kaskaskia.

Several decades later, the French felt a need to build a stronger fort to protect that area of the Mississippi and returned to the site near Prairie du Rocher. This time they abandoned the lumberyard and quarried limestone from the beautiful bluffs that lined the east border of Rocher, creating a strong, river-proof (ha!) fortress four miles west of town. They would only occupy the area for another ten years, though, thanks to the French and Indian War. The British occupied the Fort in 1765 and watched as the Mississippi wore down the south wall of the complex, reminding her new tenants that they most certainly were, like the French before them, her bitch. “Nuts to this,” said the British. “We’ll plant our troops at Kaskaskia instead.”

So the Fort was slowly worn down by the Mississippi and her sporadic flooding, and by 1900 only the powder magazine remained.

Inside Fort de Chartres

The modern history of Fort de Chartres (pronounced “Fort dee Chart-ers” by locals, since they are but dumb rednecks) is as almost as fascinating as its tenure under the French. After the State of Illinois purchased the land and restored the walls of the fort during the Great Depression (it was one of many WPA projects in the area,) it became a popular tourist attraction, and massively attended Rendezvous celebration sprung up at the beginning of every June. Then the Flood of 1993 came, and the Mississippi River eyed the fort with the same evil view she took upon the city of Kaskaskia a century before.

Boom goes Mister CannonIn the summer of 1993, there was rarely a levee in the St. Louis area that was not topped. Valmeyer to the north of Fort de Chartres fell, and flood water streamed south on a collision course with the small French village while more of the river lapped at her western levee walls. The Army Corps of Engineers came up with a brilliant plan: dynamite the Rocher levee, and the southbound water will meet the river water and rejoin it, saving the town. This worked perfectly, and Rocher was spared.

To the west, Fort de Chartres was not as lucky, as fifteen feet of water put most of her structure in the eyesight of the fish. The fort survived, though, and today it’s hard to believe how much of the building was undersea during the flood.

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Next week: Fort Kaskaskia. Which is a field. Nothing more. So we’ll do some French guy’s home as well.

Karas: The Prophecy rip

Don't Get Hot 'Cause Man You Got Some High Times Ahead

Thursday, June 30th, 2005

I don’t need to go into depth describing the summers in Southern Illinois, because I know, reader, that you’ve been near an oven before. So there you go. After several weeks of barely flirting with 80, the mercury plunged into the 90s about a week ago, and so on came the air conditioner.

Technically.

The switch was flipped, at least. The little dial was set at “78″ and the lever was moved from “OFF” to “COOL,” but that didn’t prevent the A/C from just shrugging its shoulders and puffing out a token blast of barely cooled air. Once turned on, the system ran for several days straight, unable to cool the place lower than 80 even at night, when the temperature outside was in the upper 70s. This helped the comfort level very little.

We gave up and went back to the equally useless ceiling fan.

Yesterday, off from work and sentenced to a day of sitting in the hot hot heat, I decided to give Ol’ Cooly another try. About one I popped it on, set it to 84 to be fair, and headed to the bathroom, where I promptly heard a loud, rhythmic banging noise from outside the house, as if the compressor was knocking on the wall to say, “Please get me out of this heat.” No such luck.

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Admittedly, the one advantage the A/C held, even when sentencing inhabitants to temps in the mid 80s, was to remove humidity from the air. This it did well yesterday, and I went to sleep in only mild discomfort.

I woke up this morning almost freezing.

Sometime overnight the clanging and the banging from the compressor (which wasn’t present, by the way, during the first trial last week) stopped, and the A/C brought the house down to 76, where it currently sits.

This on the hottest day of the year, where Accu-Weather predicts 103. Huzzah for timing.

Google = pwned

Wednesday, June 29th, 2005

Google Earth is the new hotness. Picking up where Google Maps left off, the downloadable application uses 3D satellite imagery to take you on a birds-eye view trip around the globe, featuring high resolution images around major cities (and for some reason, the entire states of Missouri and Indiana. But only those states. I think this is to taunt me, the Illinoisan.)

Though I’m on a dial-up connection and have no decent graphics card (since I didn’t include one when I built Paris, relying on the on-board video since I don’t play games above the graphical requirements of Freecell) I figured I’d give it a try.

One problem: Google is restricting downloads of it, and upon my first visit I was told:

Thanks for your interest in Google Earth, but we’re sorry we can’t offer you a download right now. As you know, Google Earth is in beta, and we’re still building out our ability to take on new users. We’re making good progress, and expect to be able to accept new downloads shortly, so we recommend you check back daily at earth.google.com. We hope to be able to welcome you and other new planet surfers soon.We appreciate your patience,

The Google Earth Team

After five minutes of muttering to myself and rolling my eyes, I decided to use Google’s own technology against them. After copying the url of the page, I pasted it into the Google search bar in Firefox

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, searched Google for the page, and went to Google’s cached image of their own Google Earth download page.

Success!

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Now I can sit here and wish I had a better video card and broadband internet access.

Everyone Wore Shoes

Monday, June 27th, 2005

Rants about Wal-Mart are nothing new here. Every couple months I become annoyed enough with the retail behemoth to spout off a little more, either about lackluster service or their damned self-checkout lanes, sharing my disgust and frustration with the masses.

So I should put my money where my mouth is. Literally and such.

Needing razors and a few other small items I popped into the Target closest to work today, and realize that no matter how much you remind yourself how dirty and disheveled Wally World is, you don’t actually understand the margin of filth until you visit the competition. Not that you won’t find messed-up Targets (in some corner of the world somewhere where no one ever blogs from, that’s for sure,) but the difference between the experience of shopping there and at Wal-Mart is immense.

I’d never bought anything from the pharmaceutical department of Target, so I was a bit taken aback by how well organized, properly arranged and clean everything was. On my way to the checkout lanes, I saw not a single redneck or fat-gutted, waddling mother dragging eight grubby-clothed children behind her. It was an enlightening experience to be sure.

Bye Wal-Mart. Won’t miss you.

History Lesson, Part I: Kaskaskia, Illinois

Thursday, June 23rd, 2005

Usually for one to cross from Illinois into Missouri, or vice versa, one must traverse the Mighty Mississippi. There are various ways to do this, of course, including (but not limited to, especially if one possesses the powers of the supernatural) bridges, ferries, boats and by air. If one can find the right bridge, this privileged individual can walk or cycle; the Eads Bridge in downtown St. Louis and the Old Chain of Rocks Bridge (Old US 66) in northern St. Louis City allows this, and many take advantage. No matter the mode of transportation, you must in some way conquer the Mississippi River.

In St. Mary, Missouri, though, one passes between the two states without paying the Miss any mind at all.

The first state capitol of Illinois was in the Village of Kaskaskia, one of the oldest communities in the state. Founded by the French in 1703, she saw numerous French traders sail down from Quebec and the rest of French Canada to settle at the confluence of the Mississippi and Kaskaskia Rivers to trap furs to be sent down to New Orleans. As French influence shifted Liberty Bell of the Westto British, Kaskaskia’s importance did not lessen; she remained the economic hub of the region, protected by the British Fort Gage, just to the west of the old French Fort Kaskaskia. The area was captured during the Revolutionary War by George Rogers Clark, and the inhabitants of the city celebrated their land’s independence from England by ringing the Liberty Bell of the West; a gift from King Louis XV of France, the 650-pound bell was given to the Catholic Church of Kaskaskia in 1843, complete with the inscription, “For the church of Illinois – by the gift of the King.”

Illinois entered the union in 1818, and her first capital was, of course, Kaskaskia. As settlers moved upstate, however, legislators decided a more centrally located capital would be necessary, so the statehouse was relocated to Vandalia. Just in time.

Where'd the Mississippi go?In 1844, the Mississippi, possibly because of an old Indian curse, or maybe just angry to have Illinois’ capital robbed from her banks, became angry and flooded the community, driving away many residents. 1881 saw a complete break from her path, as the river moved east, eating through the first two miles of the inferior tributary Kaskaskia, leaving only a minor, incomplete channel to the west.

Kaskaskia, Illinois was now in Missouri.

The courts, as recently as 1970, decided that the land would remain Land of Lincoln, meaning that there is technically Illinois soil west of the Mississippi. There is a small channel dividing the small town of St. Mary’s from Kaskaskia Island, so once again we do have to use a bridge to jump from the Show Me State to the Prairie State. In addition, don’t try to get there from mainland Illinois: the only bridge is on the Missouri side, since no major Illinois roads pass close enough to the Miss, and building a massive bridge across that river just for Kaskaskia would be silly; the small, narrow, poorly guardrailed stretch of pavement on the west side of the island is sufficient enough for local traffic and the small amount of tourism the community deals in.

Liberty Bell of the West building

Little but farmland remains on Kaskaskia. The 2000 census saw a 71% drop in population, down from 32 to 9. Technically, only one village in Illinois, Ohlman, has a lower population (that city came in with a big fat zero; that’s hard to beat.) (Olhman Footnote) There are a few more families on the island, outside of the incorporated town, but the flat land reveals little civilization, just several groups of homes no larger than a city block, one of which houses the old Catholic Church and the Liberty Bell of the West, no longer able to be rung thanks to a large crack down its side. Floods continue to threaten the island, pummeling her horribly in 1973 and 1993, both years cutting off access to the land by covering the roads that lead to her western bridge to the mainland.

Population 18? Welcome to Kaskaskia

Looking out over the fields of Kaskaskia seems eerie. Not that this was ever a community so bustling as to rival modern day metropolitan areas, but it was the preeminent civilization along the Mississippi River two decades into the nineteenth century. Now, only a handful of homes and their accompanying farmland remains.

Slippery Slope ipod

Lonely Kaskaskia

You can see the rolling hills and trees of Illinois to the east, but you must go west to return there. You’re a prisoner of Missouri.

(Upon further research, Olhman has successfully appealed their 2000 Census result, and now has 148 people. So Kaskaskia wins our prize for lowest. populated. city. ever. Go back up.)

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Next week: Fort de Chartres.

Open Up the "Stick With Your Wife" Barrel

Wednesday, June 22nd, 2005

The Chinese restaurant next to work gets a lot of business from us. The fact that the lunch buffet is good and cheap and located about forty feet from the front door of the store helps, particularly on hot days that I don’t feel like fighting the horrid mall traffic. They get to know you over there, and upon entry most weekdays I’m greeted with wide, eager (sometimes bored) smiles (even if they often forget to give me a fortune cookie. Then again, sometimes I get two. They never come true, save the ones about me being very organized. I get those a LOT.)

Either our Asian friends are psychic or generous, or perhaps both. The other day my take out came to $3.77, and my immediate thought was that I should have took just a little less food in order to get the full dollar and a quarter back from my five. Reading my mind, the clerk handed me a dollar and a shiny new quarter, eating the two cents. Bankrupt soon, says I.

Eating out five days a week gets old, but I can’t bring myself to make sandwiches to take in. Besides, the Chinese isn’t much worse for me, and only a tad more expensive. It’s the weeks that I go hog wild on McDonalds that kills me, but fries = crack. For shame, Ray Kroc.

Living Dead Lock Up 2: March of the Dead psp

Silent Hill divx Merlin dvdrip

Dave Miley Looks On In Regret

Tuesday, June 21st, 2005

As the Cardinals look for another win against the Reds tonight, I figured I would repost the pictures from my trip to Cincinnati in late April.

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Rednecks and HDMI are Incompatible

Sunday, June 19th, 2005

Igby Goes Down buy

The dreams are back – the ones where I work, and nothing else. I’m guessing my subconscious is angry that I let slip the fact that it likes to screw with me, so it decided to punish me by making me relive the horror. Horror.

Den of Lions divx

Oliver Twist release

Last night in my slumber I was forced to sell TVs, even though I’ve been shilling computers for the last several months. Admittedly, it wasn’t as bad as the old Best Buy dream – I wasn’t subjected to five straight hours of horrid cheapskates asking sorry excuses for questions. In their place was one irritable couple who wanted to buy a 60″ Sony LCD projection, and nothing else, and took me to task for letting them know that hooking up analog cable to a $3000 television is akin to fueling your BMW with maple syrup.

• Twice in the past day I’ve eaten at McDonalds. Twice have I been parked in the drive thru watching a dog stroll around the parking lot. This would be less interesting if it were the same restaurant, but thirty-some miles separate the two buildings, and they were very different looking dogs, both snooping around their respective lots in search of food stuffs. It should be obvious here that the prevailing hope is that it is a coincidence that McDonalds seem to now feature household animals on their propertly, more of a coincidence at least than finding a large feline presence in the area of a Chinese restaurant.

No, You Need Pot to Enjoy It, Not Pol Pot

Tuesday, June 14th, 2005

Somebody visited the site yesterday from the search string “Napoleon Dynamite is as horrible as genocide,” which is not exactly true, though I applaud the sentiment. I gave the film three stars, but waver on that decision sometimes, mostly out of annoyance at the public’s silly adoration for the film. It’s a cute little movie, offbeat and not bad, but get over it already. Watch Garden State and revel in something that is truly

Igby Goes Down the movie

awesome.

• Batman’s back. We’ve been hearing about Begins

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for about a year now, and none of the teasers did much for me, though the final trailer looked slightly interesting. Then MaryAnn Johanson Once Were Warriors rip had to call it the best film of the year (so far) and Ebert had to go all four stars on me. Now I’m SuperPumped and headed to the cinema tomorrow to bask in the awesome. Expect reviews and such, and perhaps Mr. and Mrs. Smith this weekend if time permits (and I go see the film – if, you know, time permits.)

I Like to Watch DVDs, Guy

Monday, June 13th, 2005

I FINALLY broke down and bought the Star Wars Trilogy box set, mostly because I had $20 in gift cards I could use and felt like watching several of the films again — the VHS Special Edition copies from c. 1997 just weren’t cutting it anymore, particularly with their pan and scam mentality. Yes, I must now endure Hayden Christensen’s ghost in Jedi, but I have the boss power of MCDIARMID~!

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added to Empire to counterbalance that.

One would expect the extras to be sweet, and they are; I haven’t touched the Lucas commentaries yet, but the bonus fourth disk contains enough to make my mind a happy mind. Along with an awesome selection of trailers (including the teaser for “Revenge of the Jedi” that seems quite surreal,) there’s a TWO AND A HALF HOUR documentary on the making of the three films that contained three things I’m delighted to have experienced: Anthony Daniels speaking as Threepio out of costume, Cindy Williams‘ (sad) screen test for Leia, and the original crawl for Star Wars minus the “Episode IV: A New Hope” header that was added upon re-release. It’s odd watching it less than a week after viewing a similar hour-long look at Lucas’s previous work, American Graffiti; I guess I’m taking Lucas 101 week-by-week, and need to pick up the Indy Jones box set sometime this weekend.

• While on the subject of Star Wars, you’ve probably never seen Undergrads before, and that’s a shame. Produced by MTV back in 2001, it was ditched by that branch of Viacom and shuttled over to Comedy Central where it ran occasionally on that network’s Sunday night block of cartoons (until they realized that doing such a thing at the same time as Adult Swim was stupid on the level of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays.) The thirteen episodes are nothing spectacular, an average look at four classmates in their freshman year of college, complete with the standard university themes (campus traditions, making new friends, getting really drunk, etc.) as well as more Star Wars references than Comic Book Guy could ever make in twelve lifetimes (and making me realize that I don’t quote Palpatine nearly enough.)

There’s so much heart here, though, as creator Pete Williams threw his real life experiences into the project, and it shows. Choppy animation and average dialogue keep the series grounded, but there are moments of brilliance (“We’re wicked fictitious!”) and as cliched as the characters are they still ring true and provide the occasional surprise. Rent the DVD; it’s worth a look.

Sacrifice trailer